AP Lit and the Satellite of Love

So uh AP Lit. Yeah. Sort of not happy about the essay situation — 1000 words by Friday. Not that I don't have anything to write about 1. I love writing. Sometimes I wish that I could just sit down and write a novel 2. I wish that I wouldn't have to worry about school or homework or anything else. I just want to write. Recently I've been watching loads of MST3K. It reminds me that I want to write for some small, cult classic TV show. Nothing big, but something small and personal 3. Personally, I think that MST3K is the best. It has enough followers that I'm always surprised who I can connect to, but not enough to be normal. It's not that I dislike normal, but I just don't want to be normal 4. Yesterday I watched Pod People 5, and today it's Operation Double 007 6. Both classics, I know. Well, I suppose I should get back to writing that essay though now I keep riffing it as I write.
Oops.



1 Actually, on second thought, I do have nothing to write about. My entire essay is basically saying the same things over and over. Nothing happens, but it's long, darn it. Kind of like something Stephanie Meyer would write.

2 My novel would be called "Pee Wee's Slayhouse," a psychological thriller based on the premise that Pee Wee Herman goes insane and kills all of the puppets he lives with.

3 Not too small though. Not like MeTV Saturday night at 9 "Svengoolie" small. (See? You didn't know that was a tv show, did you? That's how small it is. Though in all honesty, shows about crazy people who watch terrible movies and are from the Midwest just shouldn't be watched.)
3 (part 2) Wait a second — I just described Mystery Science Theater 3000. Darn you, Midwestern comedic charm!

4 Just kidding. I hate normal.

5 Can we just talk about how magical Trumpy is? I mean seriously. That elephant/pig/man/bear/thing is pure joy!

6 So far, the entire movie has been lots of meaningless garbage.
6 (part 2) Wait, no! I wasn't watching Operation Double 007 — I strayed to Two and a Half Men. I always get sexist, unfunny pieces of trash mixed up!